Ren and Stimpy Songs.

"Happy Happy Joy Joy" from Ren & Stimpy


 
    Hello, boys and girls. This is your old pal, Stinky Weaselteats. [*]
    This is a song about a whale. No! This is a song about being happy!
    That's right! It's the Happy Happy Joy Joy song!
 
    [chorus]
    Happy Happy Joy Joy Happy Happy Joy Joy
    Happy Happy Joy Joy Happy Happy Joy Joy
    Happy Happy Joy Joy Happy Happy Joy Joy
    Happy Happy Joy Joy Joy!
 
    I don't think you're happy enough! That's right! I'll teach you to
    be happy! I'll teach your grandmother to suck eggs! Now, boys and
    girls, let's try it again!
 
    [chorus]
 
    If'n you aint the grandaddy of all liars! The little critters of
    nature... They don't know that they're ugly! That's very funny, a
    fly marrying a bumblebee! I told you I'd shoot! But you didn't
    believe me! Why didn't you believe me?!
 
    [chorus without last line]
    Happy Happy Happy Happy
    Happy Happy Happy Happy
    Happy Happy Joy Joy Joy!
 
    * Stinky's last name is up for debate. It is pronounced closer
    to "whizzleteats". The authority for "Weaselteats" is an article
    that appeared in "Metro" magazine, a weekly for-free newspaper
    that appears at various places in Santa Clara County. The HHJJ
    song was described by the author of the article as, "Sing 'Happy
    Happy Joy Joy'. Repeat until death sets you free."
 

"The Log Song", from Ren & Stimpy

 
   "What rolls down stairs alone or in pairs
    Rolls over your neighbor's dog?
    What's great for a snack and fits on your back?
    It's Log, Log, Log!
 
    It's Log, Log, it's big, it's heavy, it's wood.
    It's Log, Log, it's better than bad, it's good!
    Everyone wants a log! You're gonna love it, Log!
    Come on and get your log! Everyone needs a Log!"

The Hangin' Song from Ren & Stimpy's "Out West"


C'mon everbody!  Let's have a hoedown!

Oh, Lord loves a hangin'.
That's why He gave us necks.
It tightens up our vocal cords
And loosens up our pecs.

So if you are a horse theif
And guilty to the bone,
Go ahead and blame a friend
And you won't hang alone.

It may be hard to swaller,
But you'll be three feet taller.
It's a dandy way to entertain your friends.

You say you are a villain,
But can't abide by killin';
Go ahead a steal yourself a horse.

Oh,  Lord loves a hangin'.
And so do we, by heck;
So get yerself a lasso
And decorate your neck.

Oh, we is awful ignorant
And uglier 'n sin;
So go ahead 'n cut us down
And hang us all again,

Hangin' that is.  Swing a spell...

The Gritty Kitty Contest winning poem. From Ren & Stimpy's "Stimpy's Big Day" I believe


Gritty Kitty ain't so pretty,
But it's really thick.
It fills my cat box oh so snug;
It always does the trick.

I like to rub it on my toe
And squish and squish and squish!
It rare offends my tender nose,
Like a smelly fish!


Its texture is a joy to me,
It's just as smooth as silk.
It makes my little whiskers twitch;
It stays crunchy, even in milk!

I may not be the President,
I may not be the Pope,
But as long as I have Gritty Kitty,
I shall never mope!

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