Helpdesk test 2008 AGM

FAILDESK TEST - 2008 AGM  

ROOLZ!!!11eleventyone!11!!!  

1\. Each question is worth three (3) marks, unless otherwise specified.
The pass mark is 40\. One (1) mark is reserved for humour and it will be awarded if your answers make the person correcting your exam laugh out loud at all. Therefore, if your answers are not funny, your highest possible 
score is 99.  

2\. In previous tests it has been necessary for you to answer questions as though you were actually replying to the user. While we may mark your exam more favourably if you do, if you are stuck for time, you needn't bother.  

3\. Write your answers on a separate page and number them.  

4\. Assume that all users are using the following:  
   chat: irssi  
   mail: mutt  
   news: slrn  

5\. If you don't know the answer, you can still receive partial marks for telling the user exactly where to find it (for example, if they want to know   
how to view the permissions for their files in a directory and you don't know about ls -l you can tell them that man ls will give them the info they   
need.)  

6\. Answers such as "RTFM" and "check a search engine" won't get you any marks.  

The internet is full of idiots. RedBrick is no exception. As a member of helpdesk your mission is to break your back helping people who are less   
knowledgeable than you. It's a difficult, thankless job, but somebody has to do it. Will that somebody be you? *dramatic music*  

Good luck!  

coconut  
johan  
landa2  

Question 1  

I'm an alumnus from DCU with an old account I'd like to get deleted just to  
get rid of my website etc. My username is: fagface and my password is:  
iamafagface  

I can't get in to do it myself because the account is expired so can you  
give me temporary access to remove my site, or you guys can just go ahead  
and delete the account completely?  

Question 2  

Hi I've recently renewed my membership as an associate by transfering the  
fee into your bank account. My username is 'fagface'. However I've forgotten  
my password and also what the host name is when you log into win scp. Can  
you pls. resend them.  

Question 3  

Hai u guise!  

what mail server do i use to get my redbrick mail using my own mail client  

Question 4  

hi  
how do I make a tarball/gzip backup of my whole redbrick account?  
thanks  

Question 5  

Hi. I have a question. What is SSH and how do I connect to RedBrick using it? I only have Linux, not Windows.  

Thank you, O Gods of Helpdesk.  

Question 6  

OMG HAI2U!1 I'M LIEK, TOOOTALLY SOOO EXCITIED TO B A MEMBER OF REDBRICK LOL!! JST 1 QUICK QUESTION! IM TRYING 2 CONNECT 2 MY ACCOUNT USING MY FTP   
PROGRAM BUT ITS NOT LETTING ME IN  

im using this login info  

server = login.redbrick.dcu.ie  
username = retard  
password = epicretard  

i know the user/pass are rite, what cud b wrong?? thx!!  

Question 7  

 cat wtf.java  
public class wtf  
{  
        public static void main(String [] args)  
        {  
                System.out.println("lulz");  
        }  
}  

 javac wtf.java  
Error occurred during initialization of VM  
Could not reserve enough space for object heap  
Could not create the Java virtual machine.  

-----  
i cant compile my java program!! help me!!  

regards,  
aids  

Question 8  

hi i need help, im trying to learn C++, does rb have any resources for getting started with this language? also can you recommend a decent website   
for more advanced techniques, or a rb member who can help me out? thx.  

Question 9  

i uploaded my website to my redbrick public_html folder but whenever i go to look at it i get an error "access forbidden"? WTF?!?!?!???? How do i fix   
this?!  

Question 10  

I was in the labs the other day and this talk, lanky fellow with punk clothes from Donegal was able to log into redbrick WITHOUT USING A PASSWORD!!   
What is this sorcery and how do I subscribe to it?  

Question 11  

i want to look at a file called 'mystuff.txt'  
i know that i need to type 'cat mystuff.txt' to look at it, but it's  
scrolling really fast past the screen,  
how do i slow it down so i can read it?  

Question 12  

how do I access the boards and post messages?  

Question 13  

ive been using chat for a while but lobby is getting boring without zyox and goldfish's lulzy antics to keep me entertained. are there any other good   
channels? how do i access them?  

Question 14  

what is screen? how do i set it up?  

Question 15  

my screen just crashed!! i detached it but now i can't reattach it. when i type 'screen -ls' it says my session is still detached though, and 'screen   
-wipe' doesn't work. how do i kill screen and start over?  

Question 16  

how do i leave a channel in chat with a quit message? also, how do i close a pm window?  

Question 17  

GAH! eleventyone! I'm trying to ssh from redbrick to my own machine,  
omg.tbh.lolzore.org and it's just hanging there, i know it's online,  
but i can't get SSH to go through! what's going on?!  

Question 18  

oh noes! All of the mail going to my redbrick address is being forwarded to my DCU address! how do I stop this from happening?  

Question 19  

how do i use hey? how do I stop receiving heys? how do I edit my hey border?  

Question 20  

in chat, how do I see who's been talking about me in a channel and what's been said?  

Question 21  

i have some files that i want other rb users to be able to edit. how do i do this?  

Question 22  

when im logging in to redbrick, i type my username in fine but when i go to type my password it doesnt show up. what am i doing wrong?  

Question 23  

Some prick on IRC keeps sending me ascii goatse images. How do I block this spa's messages?  

Question 24  

i stopped forwarding my redbrick e-mail to my dcu account. how do i read the e-mail in my rb account now?  

Question 25  

bollocks!! I think i lost a hey from someone.. I was posting to the boards and the hey popped up for a second but now it's gone. can i find it   
somewhere or at least find out who sent it? thanks!  

Question 26  

How do I connect to a different irc server when I'm in RB chat? is there anything i should know about doing this?  

Question 27  

i want to know how to "pm" someone. is this like a private channel on irc? how do i do it?  

Question 28  

i want to change my real name to Lulzmaster so this shows up when someone runs a whois on my username. help me plz!  

Question 29  

my terminal has stopped responding but my net connection is fine. any explanations for this?  

Question 30  

Can you recommend any decent text editors on RedBrick? I need to edit my website but I'd prefer not to have to upload the HTML file every time. Which   
is easiest to use?  

Question 31 (9 marks)  

Explain how you would go about setting up a tutorial for DCU students on some technical-related matter, in conjunction with your two helpdesk   
buddies. It can be about anything you want (previous tutorials have covered topics such as Photoshop, how to install/use Linux, etc.)  

BONUS ROUND  

Question 32  

Someone keeps e-mailing you about their account not being active. You've told them to go away but they are persisting. Explain in great detail what   
you would like to do to this person (and no, they are not a girl with a DD cup).  

Question 100001  

"There are only 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binary, those who don't, and those who confuse it for ternary."  

Are you confused?  

Question? Tell me what you think about me...  

Thesis: johan's cock is bigger than landa2's. Discuss.