Issue 1		The Chronic						October 2002
		Entertainment
Front Page Other News		Peter Jackson releases new 38-disk special edition DVD
Waxwork model of Pat Inglesby in National Wax Museum window actually Pat Inglesby Search for Holly and Jessica ends Sport Boggers beat other boggers in thrilling all-Ireland final		Those nerdish overweight people who buy DVD's of any old crap that comes along will be delving into their pockets once again as Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson has announced that a third version of the hit film 'The Fellowship of the Ring' will be released "Just in time for Christmas!" But this is no ordinary DVD - the set (which includes 38 DVD's) comes with its own briefcase for extra portability, should the lucky owner wish to leave their house for some reason. And with 742 hours of previously unseen footage, why would they want to do that!? "It's about giving something back to the fans," enthuses Jackson, who lights a cigar with a $100 bill. "And the fans can have this back for the low-low price of just $259.95!" And what do these 38 disks contain? "We documented our entire shoot, which lasted for 18 months. It's all there, the highs, the lows, the mealtimes. And if the dorks act now, the can receive a bonus disk entitled 'Elijah Wood's toilet time', absolutely free!" Other highlights include: the cast talking about what to do on their days off, "At home with cameraman number 5", and 3 disks worth of Peter Jackson talking about his "vision".						I'm not a nerd, it's glandular